Monday, April 5, 2010

Go!

Genesis 12:1....The Lord had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you..."

It JUMPED off the pages!! Now, I have read the Bible before and heard the voice of the Lord, but I cannot tell you in recent history when it has touched me like it did that day in January.

Over the preceding months, I could hear my "out loud voice" saying; "Oh, yeah, I know that God is in this move! I am SURE we will be fine, I am SO EXCITED"!! And at the same time, I could hear my "inside voice", the one spoken by my heart and mind, and often, the physical pain I felt in my stomach, it was screaming, "Are you KIDDING ME? NO WAY!!!" I have two young children who are taking every cue they have about the future of our family from me. There is no doubt that I have to portray the "matriarch" role, the one of wife, mother, and ultimately, the one who is going to keep our small family of four together through this huge transition. I cannot let them see my weakness, my fear, my uncertainty. For these two precious beings, I will stay strong and confident, but in all seriousness, I don't want to go!

"God Moments" began happening all around me. This verse first showed up in the weekly Bible Study I was doing with my best friend. We had to pause the DVD and rewind, because I was SURE I had not hear it right! I of course DID hear it right, and God spoke to ME in that moment from the ancient scriptures written to Abram so long ago. How humbling to realize God was speaking to me, just as He had Abram. A few weeks later, while preparing for our Wednesday night Bible Study, this verse once again made it's appearance. There is nothing more amazing than the confirmation of God through the Holy Spirit.

As I think back to those days a few months ago, it gives me joy and hope. I am not silly enough to believe that God has promised me a nation, as He did Abram, but what I DO know, is that God is the reason we are here in California. In the Bible Study I was doing before I left home, it focused on putting ourselves where God is doing a Work, and He will open our eyes to the Will He has for us. For this, I am SO excited!

It is about God, and winning those to Him. I have come, and I am willing!....

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